The Klownhouse Fest, Kiel

We didn’t have to think twice when we got the invite to play something called a Klownhouse Fest! How can you go wrong? Klowns! A House—a fest. Come on now!

Unfortunately, Anthony assured us Kiel was in Northern California, just between Stockton and Sacramento. Seems his cousin lives there….

Uh, no. Turns out it’s in goddamn Germany!

That's Klown with a K, bitches!
That's Klown with a K, bitches!

Heh. Ah well– we’ve been meaning to get back over the pond. Our last trip over in 2007 was a quick jaunt through the UK and the Rebellion Festival in Amsterdam. Besides, Alfie has some unfinished business with some Jamaican businessmen who work out of Hengrove Park in Bristol.

Under hypnosis, Alf was able to remember certain details of the traumatic night...
Under hypnosis, Alf was able to remember certain details of the traumatic night...

We were pleasantly surprised to find a few old pals had signed up for the Kfest as well. Jay Lansford has a new lineup of the Simpletones, this time around with a girl singer, of all things!
She's prettier than Snickers, but can she fart on command?
She's prettier than Snickers, but can she fart on command?

Pretty smart move when ya think about it, as it’s kinda hard to have 45 year old man jump around on stage and sound like a sixteen year old. Believe me. I’ve tried.

Also on the bill is GG Elvis, as if we haven’t seen enough of Eric’s ass…

For the love of God, man--keep the clothes on this time!
For the love of God, man--keep the clothes on this time!

And also, the fierce SNFU! Back in the olden days we would pass though Calgary or Edmonton, or one of those other goddamn Canadian outposts, and run into Mr. Chi Pig and his band. One day, he accompanied us to the local laundramat and showed us how to use the funny colored Candian money, and then took us to a liquor store where we could stock up on Wrestling magazines.

Gaaa! Where's Seargeant Slaughter when ya need him?!
Gaaa! Where's Seargeant Slaughter when ya need him?!

Mr. Chi Pig is lookin wild these days, Kinda like a cross between David Carradine in his acid days and Charles Manson–and we dig that!
Snatch the pebble from my hand, punker!
Snatch the pebble from my hand, punker!

Some dates for the CH3 European Tour 2009, more TBA:
July 29 Düsseldorf,Zakk+SNFU,Adolescents,Dickies,DOA
July 30 Hamburg,Hafenklang
July 31 Riesa (near by Leipzig) U-Punkt
Aug 1 Kiel, Klownhouse Fest – Pumpe
Aug 3 Berlin, Wild At Heart
Aug 4 CZ-Prague,007
Aug 5 A-Vienna, Chelsea
Aug 8 UK-Blackpool, Rebellion Festival

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